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Good Bank Holiday news and bad Bank Holiday news. Bad news: it was so cold on Sunday that we cracked. In August, we turned on the central heating. Good news: it was a couple of hours of shivering before we realised Management had pressed the wrong button and we hadn’t turned on the heating at […]

I like pigs. The other day, I went pig-rustling. A porker had fled his sty and was marching down the lane through the village. A passing farmer and I managed to entice him home with the aid of a skilfully flicked trail of dog biscuits flung in front of his snout by yours truly. As […]

I’ve just driven into town for some A4 paper. It’s a 14-mile round trip to civilisation, but no matter. In town, I bought some milk, a loaf of bread, the newspaper, some shortcake biscuits, a bunch of bananas, a pizza for the freezer, two bottles of red burgundy reduced to £3.79 (that’s dinner sorted) and […]

My stomach has churned today to see and hear the likes of David Cameron and Barack Obama uttering vacuous cliché about remembrance on the 100th anniversary of the outbreak of World War One. How dare they? How dare they stand over those graves and pontificate while selling weapons to child murderers, while endorsing the deaths […]